Please do not take this the wrong way, but I cannot wait until you are dead!
It is not because I dislike you, in fact I did not know much about you at all until recently. It is just that people are so much more fun after they have died.
I do not expect you to share my thoughts on this matter. It has become clear to me that people, like you, do not consider it appropriate to have fun with other people who are no longer living.
It does not matter if you agree.
It is still fun.
Maybe I can change your mind, though. Yes? Maybe, we will see what happens.
One time I found myself drawn to this old man. He was a Grandfather with a very large family. Very loving. Very happy.
Right before he died, I let him see me, and so as is usual I climbed in through his eyes.
Oh? Did you not know that? That is how I get in. I should have said this before.
Back to the point, I am inside the old man. I am the old man for as much as anyone would know. Anyone but me.
(You see how this is getting fun?)
I walked around the house of the old man. Looked through all of the things he did not open when I was watching him all that time before. I found a chest in the attic, and inside I found many, many war items!
I found a uniform. I found many books. I found an arm band.
The arm band had a funny symbol, like four bent arms on a red circle.
I dressed the old man up in this uniform. I put this armband on him. I put out all of the books, though they were in a language I did not understand.
Fun! Funny!
This is the part where I leave the old man. I sit him down and leave him. There he sits, slumped over at the kitchen table, dressed up very silly.
His family did not think it was fun, but I did! They screamed and cried, and then they asked so many questions to each other. I laughed and barked and banged my head on the walls!! It would have been better if I could explain the joke to them.
I knew that my trick was good and smart because they could not even look at the old man at his funeral.
They would probably have laughed, I bet!
That was one of my favorite playing times. Other times are okay, but that was the best. Usually I will make funny things happen like I will dress a man as a woman, and if there is make-up I will put it on him. Then I will make this body, stiff and cold, pose infront of a mirror while I laugh and laugh and laugh!!
It is hard to laugh inside a dead person. It is more like making happy faces without sound.
When someone comes home, they are always surprised! They are always yelling and crying and asking questions. If no one is with them, they will just ask "why".
I can tell you why, and that is because it is GREAT! It will probably take a moment for you to get why it is funny. Sometimes this is the sign of a good joke. It makes you think!
I have watched many people. I wait a lot, and that is boring. At least it lets me learn. I learn passwords, so I can put weird things on computers. I learn numbers, so I can take money out of important companies and make it all move to one place.
Sometimes, though, I learn something really weird that a person does, and I just have to try that. I see them doing it when no one is around, and I cannot tell if they are looking happy or guilty. I would say it is both, but I do not know if people feel two things together or just one. I will figure that out.
I like to try these things, and when I am done I leave again. The positions can be silly, hunched over or lying on the floor, but that is nothing compared to how people act when they see the dead person doing that!!
I think you know that this is funny, now. I have convinced you, yes?
It is very nice, and that is why I cannot wait for you to die.
I really want to try that thing you do!