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Topics - Slimebeast

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Creepy Media Picks / Codger's Cottage reading
« on: 05:18:24 PM 02/02/16 »

Creepy Media Picks / Candle Cove Debate on MidnightMarinara
« on: 07:33:34 PM 01/30/16 »

Slimy Stories / Clomstace, Garmabob, and Dorbenmueller
« on: 02:41:16 AM 01/29/16 »
My family inherited a lot of money when my Grandmother died.

Basically, my Mom was the only one who looked after Grandma in her later years. My Aunts, Uncles, and Cousins couldn't be bothered to visit even when they were passing through town, mere miles away. I've always kind of wondered how much of the decision to leave everything to us was really Grandma's choice... but in the end I really think she would've done it that way if she could.

After the money came in and our extended family was done sneering and moaning about it, we moved to a bigger house in a nicer neighborhood. My Mom, Dad, and little sister Joey seemed like everyone in the world up until that point. When I was exposed to neighbors I could actually talk to and a street full of children who didn't spit at each other, it was like I had stepped into a much friendlier alternate reality. One where the good guys won all the wars, and being a parent meant actually caring where your kids ran off to.

This was around the same time my sister started talking to herself. It wasn't much at first, and Mom said she was doing it because I didn't spend enough time with her anymore. Joey would sit by the windows and silently mouth words to herself. Sometimes she'd start swaying, or "dancing" as Dad put it.

In the early days of this behavior, I mostly ignored her. I felt like she was getting weird on purpose, or something. I resented her for it.

Eventually, Joey got worse. At that point, I was forced to spend several hours a day alone with her. Sundays were all-day Joey days. The fact that she was acting so strange made it impossible for her to hold onto any friends, so I was the only tool that could be used to 'fix' her increasingly antisocial, detached behavior.

Mom and Dad asked who she was talking to, if it was an imaginary friend or just to herself. The question rolled right off her back, and she answered them as if it was patently obvious. "Clomstace".

It made me laugh out loud the first time, and my parents shot me a cold glare for it. It sounded like random gibberish and I thought she was making fun of them. Then, in following conversations, the name reappeared again and again.

Who are you holding the door for?


What's so interesting in the garden?


Who took the icing off the side of your sister's birthday cake?


Obviously, this was the imaginary friend thing. Nothing new, and something easily understood by Mom and Dad even though I never had one. They didn't really try to get her to admit Clomstace wasn't real... but I took a few tries. I went all the way up to shaking her by the dress once before dropping the subject altogether after realizing just how far I had crossed the line. Getting rid of a fictional character wasn't worth getting in trouble, or worse, actually hurting Joey.

Despite every attempt to get her to socialize more and to stop pantomiming things to empty space, it got worse yet again. Someone new came into the picture.

By then, Joey had taken to drawing Clomstace and showing him his own pictures for approval or rejection. At first glance, he appeared to be an angular scribble of bright green with a single protruding line that seemed like it could have been an arm. If you watched closely, though, she always drew the "arm" first, which made little sense. The only reason any of us knew about the new guy at all was that she'd started pairing the green scribble with a purposeful purple speck with stink lines above it.

When she was asked what the new recurring thing was, she replied just as simply as she had before. Garmabob.

Apparently, where Clomstace enjoyed wandering around though the house and outside windows, Garmabob enjoyed hiding. Joey would sprint around the house carelessly, toppling things including herself. She'd throw open cabinets, turn over chairs, and empty drawers. All the while, she mouthed the silent conversation to herself.

She would "find" him, too. Suddenly and without warning, her outbursts would come to a stop as she'd scoop a small dot of nothing in her palms.

"I fooouund him!" she'd call out in a sing-song voice, before skipping back to her bedroom.

One night, I snuck into Joey's room. I had the stupid, stupid idea I could fix everything by leaving a goodbye note for her. One I had signed in Garmabob and Clomstace's names, careful to hide my handwriting as if she'd notice.

When I cracked her door, though, I found her still awake. She was standing in front of her window in her night gown, staring out at the full moon and swaying from side to side. I was a little angry, feeling my perfect plan had been ruined.

"Joey!" I whispered, "What are you doing awake?"

She didn't turn around. Didn't stop swaying.

"Clomstace is dancing in front of the moon!" she cooed.

I urged her to go to bed, but she didn't answer again and she didn't leave the spot. I nearly told our parents about it, but I couldn't bring myself to turn their doorknob and wake them up. It seemed like a bad thing to do... to wake them up in the middle of the night and give them something new to worry about.

As it turned out, they weren't spared the angst for very long. Days later, a third character emerged from the ether. The rapid succession of new imaginary characters barely gave the family time to get used to things before the next shoe dropped.

Joey was already talking to a therapist at this point. One that was giving us homework, which I didn't appreciate in the least. We tried ignoring her behavior, then we tried actively talking to her friends... it was inconsistent and frustrating to say the least.

The third friend was the most troublesome.


The names were getting more complex as they went, and for a while we were calling him Doormanure. That sent Joey into tantrums until we figured out what we were doing wrong. Apparently, this particular visitor to her hallucinations was very insistent on things being just right.

Dorbenmueller was a black spiral with five lines coming out of him. He made sure all the pictures were straight, all the books were in order, and every last toy was put away correctly. It seemed like a relief, but only until he noticed the furniture was all placed in the wrong fashion.

Dad cracked. I could see it in his eyes, one night. Even at that young age, I instantly felt a sense of dread and knew to be afraid of him in that moment. He got cold, distant, almost like Joey had been, and he started walking so heavily that things around him shook.

Joey had no idea, mostly because she was still enthralled by her very busy imaginary world. She was rocking Garmabob in her hands and talking with Clomstace (I think) when Dorbenmueller must've noticed one of Dad's boots was on its side.

"Don't touch it." Dad snapped from the sofa as Joey made her way to the front door.

She stopped, looked back at him, and continued on.

"I said not to do it." Dad snapped again, louder this time.

Joey knelt down, straightened the boot, and chattered in agreement with Dorbenmueller.

I don't even remember Dad getting up from his seat. In an instant, his TV dinner was on the floor, upside down, and Mom was screaming bloody murder as he swept Joey up by the arms. Joey shrieked as if she were being kidnapped.

With one swift kick, Dad rocketed the boot across the living room and shattered a mirror.

Joey was seated on the couch where Dad had been, again within a blink of an eye. Mom was holding her back, now, trying to protect her from herself as she struggled to get up. Dad stormed out of the room, and I guess he knew... like I did... that he was crossing a line he shouldn't have.

Joey continued to shriek as she fought Mom's grip. She insisted that she needed to put the boot back where it belonged. After everything that had just happened, she was still only concerned with putting the house in order.

Dad came back through the room. Car keys in hand. He blew past the lot of us without so much as a sideways glance. He only stopped when Joey's scream raised in pitch.

She screamed that she was sorry.

Not to Dad, but to Dorbenmueller.

She screamed apologies and begged forgiveness through tears and snot as she stared into a blank corner of the ceiling. Mom was still holding her. She was acting out so violently, now, that letting go would have sent her flying head-first into the coffee table.

Dad dropped the keys on the floor. We all stared at Joey.

"I'm sorry!" she shrieked. Her eyelids peeled back, exposing the red beneath. Her nostrils pulled open at odd angles, and her tongue began to protrude as if it was being forcibly pulled from her screaming mouth. "Dorbenmueller, no! Stop it!"

I ran to the boot and put it back where it belonged as quickly as I could. All at once, Joey collapsed into a sobbing, listless heap. It wasn't until after the fact that I noticed my feet were bleeding from the broken glass.

We sought a specialist after that. Our parents were convinced she had suffered an extreme "spasm" brought on by the stress, but I knew different. Joey knew different, as well. The adults could convince themselves that everything had a logical, scientific answer, but ironically children are a bit more mature when it comes to being open-minded, I guess.

The specialist in question lived across the country. Someone who was so highly regarded that it took most of the money we'd been given just to hire them for a few sessions. The rest of the cash went to yet another house closer to where Joey could get her therapy time.

Thankfully, it seemed to work almost immediately. The only issue that remained was Joey's slight obsession with order, and a healthy fear of our Dad which lasted for a couple years.

We didn't really have enough time to get truly "used to" the home we had to abandon, but the time spent there still left quite an impression. I didn't really think about the house itself very much until recently, when another death in the family brought Joey and I back to the general area.

Dad was too busy to come, and we lost Mom to colon cancer on my sixteenth birthday, so the two of us would have to be enough of a showing at the funeral.

I left Joey at the hotel when I drove out to look at that house. I didn't tell her I was going, naturally.

Over time, the whole ordeal... house included... had taken on a sort of mythological stature in my mind. When I was feeling particularly bogged down at work, for example, the dread in my stomach would instantly bring be back to the night Joey had been attacked by her invisible friend. In my imagination, the place itself looked deformed and uncanny.

Seeing the real thing once more put my mind at ease. It had aged well. Plenty of renovations had kept the thing up to code. As I passed, it actually looked newer than when I'd last seen it.

A single porch light shone on the front steps, and overall it looked... inviting.

Content with myself, assured that I had made the right decision, I smiled wide at the place that had become a mainstay in my nightmares. I was sure it wouldn't show up in my subconscious again.

My eyes moved up the house, to the second floor window.

Lit by the porch light, I saw the face of a little boy inside.

Mouthing words to himself. Swaying. Staring toward the full moon.

Slimy Stories / Codger's Cottage
« on: 08:30:11 PM 01/24/16 »
Hi, guys!

Right off the bat, I want to apologize for posting this here. I know it doesn't really belong but I'm hoping this post relates enough to the subject matter that you'll allow it to stay. If you decide to remove it, I understand, but I really hope you won't. :\

I've been posting around, trying to find people who have seen Codger's Cottage, a live kids' TV show from the 1980s. As far as I know from talking to people, it only aired in the United States and some of Canada.

If you've seen the show, that's fantastic and I'd love to talk about it if you want, but really the main point is that I'm looking for people who were called by Codger during his "Calls From Codger" segment at the end of each episode.

This is the part where I describe the show for anyone who can't quite place the title.

Essentially, "Codger" was a large, full-body puppet suit made to look like an elderly badger. He wore a multi-colored sweater we used to refer to as a "Cosby Sweater", though I'm sure that's not the preferred term anymore. Khaki slacks, sandals, and thin-rimmed glasses completed the look. He was covered in brownish fur, but the "hair" on top of his head was white and unkempt.

He never left his rocking chair, from what I've seen of the show, probably due to the nature of the suit. The eyes, mouth, and brows would move as the character spoke.

I saw the show as a kid, naturally, back when it first aired. We didn't have cable at my house, but the neighbors did, so I spent a lot of time in front of their set with their son, Dwayne. We watched Codger's Cottage mostly because he was a lot younger than me, and would insist on one of "his" shows for every two of "mine". I was too old at that point to really enjoy it, but watching cable television was enough to keep me there.

I've spoken to close to a hundred people who have seen the show, just here and there on forums and in chat rooms. When they don't recall anything about it by this point, I mention Codger's cat, Shamrock, and it starts to come back. (He was the green cat puppet with the Irish voice actor.)

Anyway, if you're with me now, that's great. If you don't know what I'm talking about, that's fine as well. I just don't expect you'll really get what I'm talking about from this point forward. I'm going to try to be a succinct as possible.

As I said, I want to find more people who were chosen by Codger to receive the much-anticipated phone call. This would have happened to you after Codger stopped telling his story for the day, or rather, that day's portion of the same ongoing story. (Please don't ask me how the story began or ended. I didn't see those episodes, and I haven't met anyone else who did. This is a recurring question.)

Once Shamrock made his way closer to the fire, curled up, and summarily had his tail run over by the rocking chair, Codger would stop the drawn-out story and announce it was time to call a "very special someone out there".

Dwayne got one of the calls, which is why I know the show was live despite what others have insisted. I don't care if it's "unlikely" for a puppet show to broadcast that way, myself and many others saw it with our own eyes.

Codger called him up, right on the show, and the phone rang almost immediately. As soon as Dwayne was talking with Codger, the character patiently insisted he "Turn down the TV to get rid of that pesky echo".

From that point on, I only heard Dwayne's side of the conversation, but what he told me squares up with what we saw on other episodes and what other people have said about the calls they also received. Just general stuff about being a "good boy" and doing various things like homework and chores, followed by Codger's usual ending line.

"You be good, and some day old Codger might just come stay with you for a while! Wouldn't that be as tasty as turnips?"

So if you've received a call like that, even if you don't recall watching the show, please do let me know.

Anyway, that's about it I suppose. I'm just trying to figure this all out. For anyone who wants some extra explanation, keep reading below. If this doesn't ring and bells and you pretty much just want to move on, feel free.

Basically, the reason I starting asking around about the show is what happened with Dwayne from there forward. We never really talked that much about Codger's Cottage, even after he was lucky enough to get the call that day. I wasn't interested in it to begin with, and there were so many other, much more exciting shows to talk about. He-Man, G.I. Joe, and so on.

A short time later, though, I heard that Dwayne had gotten into trouble at school. His Mom asked me to come over and keep him company, but even then he didn't really want to talk to me about it. When I pressed him, up to the point of saying he wasn't really my friend if he didn't tell me, he finally relented.

Dwayne had told a bunch of kids, ones his own age, that he actually met Codger in real life, and that the puppet had come to stay with him. Even then, I knew this was a lie, but he was so sad about being harassed and bullied over it that I didn't really want to make fun of him for it.

When he asked if I believed him, though, I had to admit I didn't. He was crestfallen, of course. Still, I felt he should've known I was too old for that sort of pretend. He showed me "claw marks" from Codger tapping at his windowsill, but it seemed obvious to me he had cut them in himself.

I even asked how Codger could've come to visit without his parents knowing, and he insisted it was because they were asleep when he did. That made it all the worse since it seemed like a desperate grasp for an explanation.

Our friendship became sort of watered down after that. The age difference was already bothering me even though we weren't that far apart, and I had moved on to Middle School where I was meeting a lot of new kids.

As the years went by, my family and I moved away and I never really heard about or spoke to Dwayne again. The only time he entered my mind was when our Mothers would speak and they'd decide it was a good idea to hand us the phone. This odd tactic to bring us back together lasted into our teen years, and it was always awkward as Hell.

I'm not sure when it was, exactly, but years later I heard Dwayne had gotten into hard drugs and hanging around people and places that were generally "unhealthy". The period of time where I was forced to talk to him despite us essentially being strangers had ended at this point.

When his Dad died, Dwayne inherited $400,000 that was supposed to help keep him secure for the foreseeable future. Instead, he spent it down to zero in a matter of months. Mostly on drugs, but also on people he considered "friends". People that all but abandoned him and moved on when the money was gone.

You can probably tell already that there isn't a happy ending here. Dwayne went missing for a while, then ended up dumped on his Mom's doorstep by someone that drove off into the night.

He had OD'd, and the last weeks of his life were spent in hospice care.

I'm still haunted by one of the few things he said to me when we were both put into the uncomfortable position of talking over the phone. "It still hurts that you didn't believe me."

There have been similar cases I've seen. Friends and family members of kids who got a call from Codger, and then said they actually got that visit. It never turned out well for them.

What's worse, though, is the simple math behind this. I want to think that a large number of people who claim they've gotten the call are just lying. I hope they're actively trolling me, or they just want attention.

See, there are too many calls. I think there are more people who claim to have gotten Codger's call than there were episodes of the show. Admittedly, I don't know how long the show aired, but that doesn't matter given what I've seen discussed.

Most people can remember which specific episode was airing when Codger spoke to them, and most of the time it's the same episode. I don't know how it could work, but four or five people remember being called during the same show, on or around the same point in time, and each of them remember having their own discussion.

They remember their exact name being said on-air.

It makes no sense, but it seems like multiple children (many children) were all simultaneously contacted by Codger at the same moment for similar yet different conversations.

The reason I'm posting this is that I want to understand what happened to Dwayne. I want to know what he wanted to tell me, and I feel like even if it comes from someone else it'll be like I finally was willing to hear him.

The only problem is that I can't find a single person who said they were visited by Codger. I mean, one who's still alive to talk about it.

Creepy Media Picks / Undercooked Analysis: Corruptus
« on: 01:51:08 PM 01/11/16 »

Umbrella meets SCP meets Dunder-Mifflin.

Random Projects / Hell Rising browser-based online game
« on: 05:38:09 PM 01/08/16 »
Zombie vs. Vampire vs. Survivor!

Random Projects / Lousy Comics (no, really.)
« on: 05:37:13 PM 01/08/16 »

Random Projects / Puny Mortals mini-comic
« on: 05:36:48 PM 01/08/16 »
Written by myself, illustrated by Dave Newbold, colored by Keith Garletts.

Random Projects / Nosferatu Graphic Novel
« on: 05:35:19 PM 01/08/16 »
Written by myself, illustrated by Justin Wayne, colored by Sal Nieto, published by Viper Comics in 2010.

Creepy Media Picks / "Corruptus" Reading
« on: 03:03:09 AM 12/30/15 »

Creepy Media Picks / "Red Snow" read by the Pasta Shade
« on: 03:35:42 PM 12/25/15 »

Slimy Stories / Real Cop Drama with Officer Glad
« on: 05:16:51 PM 12/12/15 »
This is yet another post asking for information from other internet users about a TV series that aired a while back. If you have some helpful information, please feel free to comment and/or message me personally.

I'm pretty much positive that remember the title as "Real Cop Drama", but I could be wrong. The opening is a montage of real-life crime footage from CCTV and dash cams, set to an instrumental version of "I Fought The Law". Each clip stops abruptly before someone is shot, hit by a vehicle, etc.

I'm definitely sure that the host of the show was called "Officer Glad". Of course, probably not even his actual surname. He was a slightly dumpy, older cop. White hair, a few wrinkles, and the typical "dead fish" frowny-face you see on old dudes who have had enough bullshit in life. Boston accent.

I saw about five episodes of this series back in the mid-2000s when I was still young and living with my parents. We had Eagle as a cable provider, but they didn't keep up on the bill so we just got whatever happened to be de-scrambled or relatively watchable through the fuzz. It was on channel 5, but of course with no working box I'm sure that wouldn't have been the intended location.

I'm not sure if any of this sounds familiar to anyone reading this, yet. The show would always open with Officer Glad stepping out of the shadows on a green screen "street corner" location, and his opening catch phrase was "Scofflaws won't sleep soundly, tonight." followed by "I'm Officer Glad" and a short description of the night's theme.

Not sure what the original air time was, or even the original air dates. Since it would be about three or four AM when I'd tune in, I can't imagine I was seeing anything other than repeats. I was in high school at the time and had a lot of anxiety about upcoming school days.

Production value was nearly non-existent outside of the shoddy green screen and opening montage. After a brief intro for each following vignette, uncut raw footage from various Police-related incidents would play.

The show was exploitative to the nth degree. Vehicular homicides from traffic cameras, grainy security footage of deadly convenience store robberies... nothing appeared to be off limits for the show. Unlike the opening sequence, these clips showed the blood and gore without a shadow of shame.

One that haunted me for years to come, which I just purposefully don't think about now, involved a young woman trapped under a city bus that had run up on the sidewalk. All you could see from the haphazard, shaky camera footage was her head and arm sticking out next to one of the tires.

She looked around with a pallid expression of shock as he arm slowly, absently felt along the concrete. Her mouth moved but nothing came out. When the camera adjusted slightly, looked under the bus itself, I could see that the rest of her body was elsewhere. Her attempts at calling or feeling for help were just the random motor functions of severed body parts.

The thing that bothered me the most was her body, though. The summer dress, the single red high-heeled shoe. In that fleeting moment of horror, the imagery also told a story about her. I couldn't stop wondering where she was going that day, who she was going to meet, and what would have happened in her life if that horrible moment hadn't occurred.

I'm off-topic. Really, I just want to find out if anyone has some information on this show. I want this to be fake. I want to find out that the whole thing was staged with very good practical effects. If I can go through the rest of days with the knowledge I was very expertly trolled by a shitty exploitation show, I'll be able to sleep a little better.

I do think there's a good chance the show was staged, and if you do know the series, you'll probably agree once I talk about the evidence.

The majority of footage centered on traffic stops, which were interspersed with the horrific random accident clips. Of course, these segments were just as bloody.

The stops followed a sort of pattern. Dash cam footage of a vehicle breaking a traffic law like failing to signal, running a stop sign, or driving erratically.

After the officer pulled the driver over, a disagreement would ensue. The driver would insist they hadn't done anything wrong, or they'd say that their infraction was hardly worth the trouble of ruining their day. A couple got really agitated and demanded lawyers or constitutional citations on the spot.

In each clip, the argument was loud, but brief. The minute a gun was drawn on the driver, they'd instantly clam up.

The theme would swell up again. "I Fought The Law". The audio would drop except for that instrumental piece as the officer would fire several shots into the vehicle and strut away as if they'd completed a job well done.

There were some runners. Two or three drivers managed to get out and run, only to be shot in the back until they were face-down on the pavement. Then, a single bullet to the back of the head at close range.

A passenger jumped out at one point and darted into the woods nearby. The officer calmly returned to the patrol car, retrieved a spot light and shotgun, then just as calmly followed after. One of the few actual edits to these clips occurred when the cop returned alone with an additional handful of empty shells.

One of the cars had a "Baby On Board" sign, but it was impossible to see what happened to the supposed child. I convinced myself it wasn't there that day.

The reason that I think this is fake, that I PRAY it's fake, is the common thread in all of the videos.

Every time someone gets pulled over and killed, it's by Officer Glad. The doughy, hard-nosed old man with the white hair and tired expression.

I want to believe this was just a very strange prank show, or a spin-off I don't understand because of the lack of context. The gore porn is bad enough, and it's what still disturbs me the most, but if Office Glad is actually a real person and not a character... it makes everything so much worse.

Those few episodes of that show scared me straight. As I mentioned, I was still young at the time and it had a lasting effect on how I view the law and the people who enforce it. I've been as straight an arrow as you can imagine from that point forward - and make no mistake, I was no saint before then.

It does little to comfort me, though, to know that people were executed for the most minor infractions. Things they didn't even know they were doing, or had no control over.

I'm not a "scofflaw", but I still can't sleep soundly at night.

The Slime Pit / open!
« on: 08:50:17 PM 11/14/15 »
Hey, guys.

I opened as a Creepypasta/Horror only site.


Creepy Media Picks / Undercooked Analysis: A Few Suggestions
« on: 07:21:09 PM 11/13/15 »

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