This morning cartoon baffoon
will be crawling home soon.
I know clowns who make scarier
beasts out of balloons.
You wail on little animals
trapped inside of machines.
Now you'll fail, I'm a cannibal,
chianti and fava beans.
I'll oil up with your blood,
I'm a killer robot.
My last name should be Kruger,
'cuz you dream of what I got.
I'm gonna go fast, bitch,
don't need five nights to beat you.
Chuck some Cheese in your face,
'cuz I'm going to eat you.
This battle ain't fair, bear,
I'm a nightmare, you're a jumpscare.
You ain't raising my spiked hair,
it was already up there.
You can choke on a chilidog,
That's what I call my dick.
Stay away from Green Hill Zone,
or I'll bust a cap in your Ro-butt-nik.
Hey look, little kids,
It's a fad from the 90s.
A relic from game history,
that won't stay behind me.
So you curl up in a little ball,
my players do that, too.
What are you, an extra small?
I have a suit that should fit you.
My horrifying death screech,
is the last thing my victim hears.
When you step on my turf, son,
the only rings are in your ears.
I've heard this kind of crap before,
every plot against me fails.
Poke your head in through the door,
I'll ram my knuckles up your tails.
I played your game and I'm confused,
Is it intended to be fun?
What's funny is I fell asleep,
and still got past night one.
You're a roided up Fozzy,
just a juiced-up Mecha-Muppet.
You're about as serious
as a fucking finger puppet.
I have a big surprise for you,
and I hope you have the stamina.
While you've been talking trash to me,
You forgot the Pirate camera.
WHAT DOES THE FOX SAY?
Broken down, dead, shit, that's what they said.
Put in motherfucking moth balls, sent to bed.
Act like I'm a lunatic who won't take his meds.
Let out to pasture when I wanna paint the walls red.
All because I bite like a fucking great white,
see a little kid and I gotta get a taste, right?
That's why I run around every damn night.
Who's this little blue shitball I got in my sights?
The furry face of Sega, icon of a generation.
At least until that Sonic 06 abomination.
When's the last time you captivated a nation?
We're twice as popular with half the animation.
Check any game ranking and we're number one.
Annoying Water Levels? We ain't got none.
Hmm! Turns out drowning wasn't all that fun.
I'll ring-ring-ring-da-ding your neck, son.
You're not a scary bear, Fred,
you're docile and you're tame.
You rarely come off stage,
because you're addicted to the fame.
Enjoy the birthday brats,
and all their laughter while it lasts.
I'm a diehard, you're a try-hard,
your fifteen seconds came and passed
Your game's a "Slender" cash in,
made by a cell phone gaming Christian.
I AM GOD, pray for mercy,
on your knees, take position.