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Author Topic: Norman Bates vs. The Joker  (Read 2435 times)

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Slimebeast

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Norman Bates vs. The Joker
« on: 01:14:24 AM 12/06/14 »
(It helps to picture Norman dressed as his Mother and the Joker dressed as a nurse ala Dark Knight.)

Norman:

Mother! Will you relax?
I can handle this clown.

You didn't raise a pussy,
so just CALM THE FUCK DOWN.

Now I know you're not the Riddler,
but I have to ask a question.

Are you a sad attention whore,
or is it just Manic Depression?

I'm the kind guy who's been
a butcher since his teens.

You're a pasty faux Gacey,
I'm a gruesome Ed Gein.

Hello? Mr. Napier?
This is your rap wake-up call.

Check your ass out of my Hotel,
or you'll never leave at all.


Joker:

Aw, don't be a party pooper.
We could've been best fiends.

I mean, we both like cross-dressing,
and blood-spattered crime scenes.

It's a shame I have to kill you,
all the fun we could've had.

Just ask Harvey how I helped him.
His new style ain't half-bad.

(Though I suppose, technically,
that's not really true.

It all washes out, though,
since he's half-good, too.)

You're not funny OR exciting,
so cut the creepy cord, Sonny.

By the way, she's dead, you dork,
bury that dear old Mummy.


Norman:

I'm sorry I'm not impressed
by a stooge who pulls his pranks,

in unrealistic fashions, just
to knock over some banks.

Look at this reeking hobo Bozo!
Am I laughing? Hardly.

Did you fall into the sewer,
on the way to some Kid's party?

Shit, you're only "friend"
happens to be your nemesis.

Why not forget about the fighting?
The two of you should kiss.

I can't believe you're the douche
a girl like Harley Quinn dates.

By the way, love her outfits.
She can call me Master Bates.


Joker:

Knock Knock! Who's there?
Orange. Orange who?

Orange you tired of a corpse
Hitchcock-blocking you?

You should've quit, for Todd's sake,
but I see you're back for more.

The only shower I'm gonna take,
will consist of blood and gore,

as I slash your throat and leave
you choking on the floor,

and that's not even the best
trick that I've got in store!

I'm not the electro-shock patient
whose buttons you should be pushin',

You like taxidermy, Norman?
I'll make your face my whoopee cushion.
« Last Edit: 04:18:08 PM 04/28/15 by Slimebeast »
If I should live until I wake, I pray the web my death to fake.