Author Topic: TwoInterviewees.exe  (Read 3785 times)

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Skill Flea

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on: 11:35:27 AM 03/08/16
(Note: this is a followup of "Super Hyper-Realistic Smoking" It is recommended you are familiar with the original story before continuing – you fucking morons)

After my partner died from smoking, I was alone a lot of nights. The cold, cool refreshing taste of a Bud Light hit the back of my throat one night as I reflected on what my life had become. I was forced to retire from the force, I guess they don’t take to kindly to the excuse “he died in a Nintendo game”. My wife had also left me with my fucking son but that’s not why I am here. The reason I’m still alive is because of that game. That accursed game. That unholy abomination:

“Ask me what it means” by Mauro Vanetti.

Now my son was messing around with a bunch of these chucklefucks on this website called Gamejolt. Being the tough ex-cop that doesn’t play by the rules, I had asked him to go outside. He didn’t want to so I had to … eh, you know the rest. After his sobbing ass went outside, I decided to look at his computer. Yeah, so what if I was bored and had an alternative motive?

I saw that he had downloaded and opened up this game called “Listen to me, I’m profound!” By Mauro Vanetti. The strange thing was that the name of the file was called “TwoInterviewees.exe” which made no sense to me. I mean if the file was called TwoInterviewees.exe, than why did the title screen clearly say “Look how subtle I am!” by Mauro Vanetti?

I hit the start button and began playing “The Vagina Monologue” by Mauro Vanetti. The first image that pop on the screen made me jump back in fright!!

Now, listen. Listen real good. Even with my own limited experience with the haunted game “Smoking Simulator”, I understand how to spot a haunted game. This time I was prepared. Now look, if you don’t want to have nightmares stop reading now!! Your psyche may be broken just by viewing this image. So I’m warning you guys now to turn back while you still can!!

Ok then. Prepare yourselves.

When I hit the start button two people appeared on the screen. One a man and one a woman. 

I swear on my badge that neither of them had faces. I even took a screen shot so that people will believe me this time:

*insert screenshot here8

It was so creepy.

Now I was hooked. A game took my partner from me and now I had a chance for revenge. I decided to commit to playing through the whole game. For my partner’s eternal rest, “Beaver Fever” by Mauro Vanetti was going to pay.
The gameplay was incredibly easy and I beat in the game after a few attempts. The premise is simple, you play as the two disturbing faceless characters and make the same decisions for them. Most people can’t spot what the game was trying to do here. Luckily, as a detective, I knew how to crack this case like so many others. It was so obvious! The game was trying to say that two interviewees for the same job can’t get that same job!1 Well of course, its only one job, I mean what did the developer expect? That two people can coexist within the same space? Ugh … idiot.

Eventually, I successfully got the man the job and beat “Did you know women can’t get jobs” by Mauro Vanetti! I was victorious!! My partner could now rest in peace! And as I went into the files to delete this thing I knew that I had conquered my greatest fears! Until I realized something as the final file was deleted. I never got the girl the job. What happened? Why couldn’t she get hired!?

Then, I felt a presence near me. All I can remember before blacking out was a soft voice whisper something into my right ear.

“Ask me what it means.” 
« Last Edit: 11:37:47 AM 03/08/16 by Skill Flea »
Tell your pets its personal this time.

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